A Sign

Recently, I met up with a friend who now resides in Shanghai. We put in deliberate efforts to keep in touch. Her years in Beijing and Shanghai. My years in UK and US. We always return to Singapore whenever our term ends.

Now that her kids are in their schooling years, she puts them in an international school in Shanghai and whenever she comes back to Singapore for a few months, her kids follow her and she chucks them into their primary schools in Singapore for a few months. I would say this is a unusual way of a typical parent who shuffles their kids routine life.

I completely agree with my friend's unsual way of bringing her kids up, given her cirsumstance. Her kids will be exposed to a broad education systems, having international exposures, classmates from different nationalities, yet at the same time, attend a Singapore local school, studying in the academic driven education system, spending time with grandparents....my list can go on..... The impetus is....can the kid cope?

My bet is YES. We, adults, typically undermines the ability of kids' adaptability. Adults naturally determines what is best for their kids before even allowing them to try it.

Take this for example (I saw this on a MRT train). A mother and child (I called her Child Z) boards the train. The mother inevitably looks for seats as most adults have the pre-programmed mindset of getting a seat on the train is something theu should do. When a seat becomes available, the mother would give the seat to the child Z so that the child remains in a 'protected' and 'stable' confines and that....its 'GOOD'.

However, within that same MRT, is another child (I call her Child P) who is irritating other commuters by not sitting, trying to balance in that moving cabin, playing with the poles and trying to catch the hanging bars by jumping.

Child Z looks at Child P in awe. Child Z would probably enjoy standing but was told to sit. She would probably want to try to balance in that moving cabin but was told to sit. All these due to Mother's preconcept that it is for her own good. But deep inside, she is in envy, in awe of Child P.

So, what's so wrong with standing? Fear of kids injuring themselves? Fear of ......? Or a pre programmed notion in the brain that sitting is good? So what if they fall? Fall then!!....and let them understand what is pain lah!!!

I spoke about the above scenario when another of my friend told me of her plan to migrate to Australia. She said it is a better place for her kids to grow up, more space to run.

"What utter rubbish", I said "What makes you think that its a better place for your kids to grow up? That's what you think it will be!!! Not what it will materially be!!! And possibly not exactly what the kids want!!"

How about the grandparents? Why did we chose our young rather than our parents/ancestors? That the old has lived their lives and waiting for death that there should not be any quality? My list of questions can go on and on......

I have been stirring over these thoughts for some time. And somehow I relate them to my inability to conceive now. Someone up there is showing me something, is telling me something.....